dOOMhAMMER

 "Cos of death: stabbed in the cheek"

 once

 i walked in a bathroom

 and

 powder was takin a bath

 and i was like

 hey

 ure naked

 put some clothes on

 so

 i took

 his clothes

 and threw them in the tub

 and he got mad

 and i said

 hey

 put those

clothes on naked guy

 but he was mad

 and

 didnt

 and i was like

 hey

 ?

 "end"

"Schmendi"

once

there

was this

bear

and

he took a shit

and i was like

hey bear

u took a bear shit

and he said

good call dooms

and i was like

wow

u know my name

and was like 

good call dooms

and i said

hey

r

u

gay?

and he said

good call dooms

and i was like 

wow

were both psychic

lets make a hotline

so

we

ran to jupiter

and

ate biscuits

then

halle berry

ran over Berry Bear

and i was like

I see u halle berry!

u did that!

come back here!

and then

i left mars

or whatever

and 

halle berry smoked a blunt with me

and 

we

ran

over cows

and

then ran

but then

she died

and i said

hey

ure dead halle berry

 ........

 eh

 um

 im leaving

 then

 i

 got lost

 "end"

dELDDS

"footage"

i went to the zoo

there were people there

who didn't like me

i had a camera

maybe that's why

i took film of them

they were interesting

one man had a blue ass like a monkeys ass i said hey man you got a blue ass he said i know i sat in paint

i said you got a monkey

he just looked at me funny and walked away

the next day

i went to the park

and saw two people having lots of sex in the grass by the freeway

amazingly, they were fully clothed

and still enjoying it 

and doing it

only the zippers were askew

so i gathered my courage

went up to them

and said

is either of you named corcoran?

they said no go away you dumb bitch can't you see we're having hot clothed sex?

i said i know but there's a freeway there and eww yall are nasty asses and they said you're a hick

and i said 

i know

and they said

get your camera away from me

end

"carrot top"

this story is about

anything

but carrottop

because he sucks

a lot

mmm

canopy beans

smells like

haricots vertes

with pinnemola

sauces

and poo

my dog

poos by this little house

in the corner of the little house 

i call it

the house at poo corner

i took a ride on the bike of charlie to the house of matt to cheat on the project of steve

it was a spanish project

autoscatological

modern poetry=japanese fiction

my art

is the best art

with peas 

and i am quite hungry

for food

that tastes like

mouklhds

i locesfjk

my peanut butter fetish

dissolves

when i discover a new fetish

pink wallpaper

buy pink wallpaper 

then put in on the floor

instead of the wall

then have mad sex on the floor

without peanut butter

or hummus

and you will be 67% better than you were before you remembered you came

then you shedded hair

and died upon the mortal carpet

of death 

and shittitude

end